Can't Stand Me Now

Many years and many scenes have dulled my remembrance, but still the warm air of spring brings back to me the sound of quiet country lanes, the scent of great orchards of apple trees, and, above all, a vision of the lovely maidens of France. They were the very finest of their sex, as we soldiers may be said to be of ours. Ah, the youth, the beauty, the valour, and then the dull, dead years that blur them all.

The memory of these glorious times, which weighs on my heart like lead, came back to me today as I read of Pete Doherty's romantic liaison in 2001 with French ex-girlfriend, Carole Desbois, who paints an unflattering picture of her former lover in London's News of the World. According to Desbois, Pete "never kept going sexually for more than a few minutes at a time. The drugs definitely affected his sex drive. He often went limp during sex because of the drugs.... He's pretty inexperienced." Before she consented to sex, Desbois said she had to scrub Pete down. "It was like standing next to a pile of manure. The grimy odor would have put me off having sex. I did everything for him that night from washing his hair to clipping his fingernails because they had so much dirt underneath." Desbois clarified that this was before Pete started shooting up. "He was only smoking cannabis, taking speed [or] acid," she notes. "He hadn't moved on to hard drugs. He didn't have the money."

Yes. Yes. How we all must take pity on poor Kate Moss for not having dated Pete when he was in his prime and knew nothing of either smack or soap. Those were golden days indeed.